Tag: life

Steward the Season

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Do you ever wonder what on earth is happening in life? You felt like you’d be in a different place, or further along. You feel stuck or overwhelmed by circumstances you can’t change. You want MORE but life feels so mundane? I’ve been there and I’ve felt that.

I think we’ve all had moments like this but looking back, I see how every season—though not linear or glamorous or even what I expected—worked together to prepare me for now.

By many standards I’m not the most success friend in the circle, yet I do feel very fulfilled and successful in life. How can both be true? How can I be so far from where I want to be yet so content with the place I’m at? I think it’s because I’ve built my life from the inside out.

I’ve found contentment in so many stages of life because no matter where I am, or what I’m doing, I am committed to learning and squeezing out as much experience I can. I want to learn and grow no matter where I am or what I’m doing. And more than that, I believe that life, people and experiences can teach me so much if I’m willing to listen and learn.

I may not have ‘arrived’ at some moment where I’ve got it all put together but what if we’ve gotten it all wrong and arrival isn’t the most important part?

What if the journey is?

I remember going back to my very first job as a cashier at a little diner like restaurant in my hometown, I worked my butt off. And I began to learn and grown until one day I had the experience to work at a high-end Italian restaurant making way more money but more importantly, learning so much more. Ironically, when I got there, I started from the bottom, again. Many people would never have taken a job that appeared to be a step back, but I could see the bigger picture, and I was in it for the long game. I learned so much about serving others, problem solving, talking to people of all ages, life experiences, educational and socioeconomic status and that has helped me to be the person I am today.

This might seem like random circumstances or odd jobs to you, but to me it was a string of experiences that shaped my life and who I became. I was curious, I learned how to not just do a task but to grow in the circumstances I was in.

This pattern continued time and time again and even as I write this, I see my choices like a sling shot. It may have appeared to others as I was taking a step back, but it was strategic. And through the strategic ‘pull back’ moments of life, I was then released forward at the right time with speed and strength.

I want to encourage someone today to steward your season well.

Become a student of it.

If you are waiting for a certain season, circumstance, job or relationship to satisfy you, you might as well be showing up to the gym and not working out or going to college and skipping class because you won’t grow or learn a single thing in life with those habits or that mindset.

When I look back over the course of my life, I cannot help but see how much each season, every job, every relationship, every pregnancy, every postpartum, every leadership challenge, every ministry I served in, they all worked together to form the skills and experience I need today in this season of life.

So I want to encourage someone today- don’t sleep the season.

SQUEEZE every last thing out of it while you can because one day you’re going to need it.

I’ve never been the girl to say ‘that’s not my job’ and I’m thankful for that. What people perceived as me sucking up or serving others, I saw as serving my future self. I don’t know how, but in my heart, I always knew that it all mattered, all the details, all the experiences, it mattered. And if I could work hard and learn a lot, one day, those experiences would serve me well and when I look around, I can honestly say they are.

As I type these words this morning, I’m thinking of the person who feels stuck, overlooked, in the weeds of motherhood or not as far in their career as they hoped they’d be.

Listen to me carefully, one day this will all make sense. One day you will live in the fruit of this moment, steward your season well. Learn whatever you can where you are right now, do not leave one crumb on the table! Be the one who works hard even when no one is looking, say YES to new projects, MANAGE YOUR HOME WELL. You can learn and grow so much as a person by leaning into what is right in front of you.  

To the person who is frustrated about all the things they have yet to do, see or accomplish, I want you to take out a notebook and take a look around, look at every aspect of your life and then at the top of a blank page write the question ‘what can I still learn here?’

Let your mind wonder, think expansively. It can be technical skills, but maybe it’s relational. It can be things outwardly noticeable, or it can be the things no one sees in your unhealed heart.

Be intentional today about leaning into to where you are right now and what you can learn in this season. I promise you, your future self will thank you.

If you’ve made it to the end, thank you for reading. I hope you feel encouraged to pursue growth where you are with what you have. If this was helpful, share it with a friend or leave me a comment- I love to hear your feedback!

Xo.. LB  

Hi again.

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It’s been two years and one month (to the day!!) since I’ve been here. TWO YEARS!! I can’t believe it. It never ceases to amaze me how something I love so much and feel so called to can so easily fall not just to the bottom of the list, but off the list completely.

I could give you a hundred reasons why that’s the case but where is the value in that? Instead, I just want to share my heart for why I’m back and what pulls me into this space when life seems to keep pushing me away.

Short answer; you. YOU are the reason I’m back. For the reader that gets to the end of the page and feels even a little more hopeful, a little more encouraged, a little more empowered, a little more understood or a little more seen- I’m here for you.

This world is so loud, and something or someone is always telling us at every turn to ‘do this’ or ‘buy that or ‘try this’ as we run on the hamster wheel of becoming the best version of ourselves or worse, attempting to be someone else. In the middle of all that, I want to be the voice that says;

You are enough.

You have all that you need to do what God has called you to do.

And it’s never too late to start again.

My heart is to see people live life fully. Regardless of the season or circumstances, I have a conviction that these big, beautiful lives we have are a blessing, not a burden, even if you can’t see that yet.

So, join the journey and together we’ll walk this thing out, one step at a time.

Xo..Lori


PS- this doesn’t count as this week’s post so hit subscribe and don’t miss the content to come!

TRIGGERED

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Have you ever stopped in a moment and prayed something like this;

‘Lord, give me patience to deal with them!’

‘Jesus, please help me get through this meeting with this group of crazies!’

‘God, I am SO ANNOYED and frustrated, help me to be at peace.’

‘God, what is wrong with people!?’

If you’re like me, you pray prayers like this all the time desperately trying to get through the madness we face on a regular basis. Sometimes these desperate prayers just come out, quick and easy, without any thought or effort but lately, it’s been different for me. When I find myself praying these prayers, asking God things like ‘What is wrong with these people?!’ I feel the Holy Spirit nudging me towards a different kind of question…  Questions like ‘Why does this trigger me?’

Since I started to get this little leading from the Lord, I’ve been asking myself over, and over (and OVER) again- this very question.  ‘Lord, why does this trigger me?’

 

Asking the right questions has helped me to get to the root of MY ISSUE and become more accountable, rather then pointing the finger at someone else and expecting God to ‘fix them’ or change my situation.

Today I had yet another ‘God, why does this trigger me?’ moment.

I was dropping my daughter off at school already feeling frustrated that the morning derailed and turned into a yelling and crying match. I walk in and Sav’s teacher begins with the small talk, ‘How are you? How are you feeling?’ and then continues to tell me all about Savannah’s progress with her letters.

Now for the sake of back story, this wasn’t the first time I heard this. The first was via progress report that was sent home. After reading the progress report and the recommendations the first time, I was upset and frustrated.  I thought of everything I would say to this teacher. Things like;

‘I would like to see the curriculum you’re teaching.’

‘What’s your plan to give Sav’s letter memory more attention during the school day?’

‘How often are you doing letters throughout the week?’

But when she began to speak, I just teared up with Savannah, standing next to me full of smiles and totally unaware of what was happening. I think all she heard was the great job she was doing with most of her letters and totally disregarded the portion about the letters she didn’t know. In an effort to keep it together, for Savvy’s sake at least, I just nodded my head in agreement, kissed Savannah good-bye and then left to my car where I cried my way to work.

‘Why did this trigger you?’ I felt the Holy Spirit ask me in my no words, tear filled moment.

Why did this trigger me? Why was I losing my mind over this moment? I reasoned with myself that my husband and I sacrifice a lot financially to put her in this school, we wanted the best for her, isn’t this their job? And that’s why I felt frustrated. Then I thought about how she would be starting Kindergarten next year and I wondered ‘will she be prepared?’ Being that kindergarten is about 7 months out, this was a premature concern so then the question remains, what is it? Why did this trigger me?

As I drove, guilt the weight of this world began to crush me.

–          I should have more time to work with her.

–          If I wasn’t working full time, I would- I could!

–          If I could just be there for her more, this wouldn’t be an issue.

There it was, the trigger; the feeling of ‘being a full- time employee makes me a part time Mom’ guilt.

I was so upset because I felt like it’s all my fault, I felt like I can’t be there for her the way I want to be because I’m working, I felt like life will always make me choose and I can never, ever have the best of both worlds, someone or something will always feel the burden of this sacrifice.

Ugh. I hate this trigger. Of all the triggers, this is the worst because it attacks one of the things I hold dearest to me, motherhood.

I wish I could say in that moment, I shook it off, moved on and forgot all about it. I wish it was that simple, but it’s not. I felt frustrated, sad, even confused. Even as I pen this note, I’m asking the Holy Spirit ‘so what’s the answer?’

And all I hear is this; GRACE.

There is grace for this place. There is grace for this life. There is grace for this, not just for me but for my children, for my husband. I believe firmly that when you are called to something, anything – whether its motherhood, marriage, ministry, a job or career, school or training- whatever it is, when you are called to that, the Lord graces you for the journey as well as those who are meant to be on the journey with you.

For example, I know that I KNOW my husband is graced for me and my life as I am for his. Going to school, the personal aspirations I have, the fact that I was a dozen babies (joking- kinda), he is graced for that because he is meant to be on this journey with me.

Today, I’m reminded that my girls are also graced for this journey. Out of all the wombs that God could have placed sweet Savannah in, He chose mine. And that sweet and sassy baby girl is graced for this journey. She is graced to have a mom in the workforce, she is graced to be raised by parents in ministry, she is graced for this life because when God chose me as her mother, He graced her to be my daughter and when He chose her as my daughter, He graced me as her mother.

God didn’t slip, fall and drop her into my lap, or womb for that matter. This was a precise decision made in Heaven and if it makes sense there, surely it’ll make sense here.

Maybe you’re not a mother or this isn’t your struggle but I would challenge you that we all have triggers. This was my trigger today, other days my triggers vary. What’s your trigger?

I just want to encourage someone today who’s been triggered by something and it’s sending you into a spiral of frustration and guilt-  you’re graced for this! And so are your children, your spouse and the people who are meant to be on this journey with you.

Be a good steward of what’s before you. All of it. Don’t resent or despise it because God, in all His wisdom chose you for this path. Is He, I mean could He, ever possibly be wrong? I think not.

WANNA RACE?

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The New Year is upon us and everyone has a new resolution, goal and plan for 2017. If you scroll through your Facebook timeline or chit chat with some of your closest friends, you’ll see that most people expect to grow in some way this year whether professionally, personally or relationally.

I’ll be the first to say that I love goals, I love planning, I love challenging myself and I love to hope and dream for the future! All these things are great, but in this process there is one simple notion I am very intentional about keeping in mind; life is a collaboration, not a competition.

Challenge yourself, push yourself, create goals and prepare for growth but measure your success by who you use to be and what you aspire to be, rather then what the person to the left or the right of you is doing.

Wanna race?

Thinking about this concept of ‘compare and contrast’ and our innate instinct to compare ourselves to those around us and contrast our success to theirs, I was reminded of a funny story. A few years ago I was fortunate enough to work with 2 of the most amazing women I’ve ever met. We went from being co-workers to friends quickly and it made for some of the best days at work.

We would laugh, talk and joke around to make the days go by faster. It was great!

Well one boring afternoon, one of my friends and I decided to play a trick on the third friend. The joke would be that I would challenge her to a race (yes, like a running race) around the building. She was much more fit then I was) but the plan was, once she took off from the front door, I would go back into the building, find my way to another door, go out that exit and essentially short cut to the finish line. In hindsight, I’m not sure why we thought this was such a good idea or even so funny for that matter, but I guess it goes to show how boring our days were.

Anyways, we’re lined up at the front, ‘On your mark, get set, GO!’ and we both took off. I quickly ran back inside, did my little short cut thing and then came back to the front door where we first started. She runs up a couple minutes later gasping for air (apparently she’s very competitive and took winning very seriously). As she approached, she said something like ‘YOU beat me?!’ and I said, something like ‘that’s right I beat you!!’ She looked around, ‘No way! I didn’t even see you pass me!!’ I said something to the effect of ‘That’s because I was running SO fast, I just whizzed right past you!’

It was honestly, hysterical. I laughed so hard that I gave myself up in no time. We both walked into the office, me laughing, her still gasping for air, it was seriously great.

As entertaining as this story is, I think the underlying principle is noteworthy; the only person you’re racing is yourself.

It’s easy to get on your mark the first of the year, get ready and then set off on this race to the finish line, hoping to whiz past every other person that crosses your path but the reality is, while you’re ‘racing’, others are simply doing their thing. They aren’t thinking about you, they aren’t considering you, they are simply running their race, doing their thing, their way.

During this time of year it will be easy to look at those around you and immediately begin to measure up to them.

‘How did they lose so much weight?’

‘What made her qualified for that position?’

‘How can they afford a new car?’

‘Why did he get that job?’

‘Did they really just buy a house?’

‘Did you see how many likes that post got?!’

‘Are they really getting married before me?!’

The list can go on and on, but the point is simple, another person’s success does not equal your failure. You’re not racing against them, you’re running with them.

When you feel temped to compare and contrast, don’t. That’s it, that’s the key!! Just don’t. Nothing good comes of that. Focus on your journey and realize those around you are just running their own race with you, not against you. It’s ok if we’re all going in the same direction, it’s ok if we have some of the same goals, it’s ok if some days those around you seem up while you feel down, it’s ok! The point isn’t to be better then the next person, by that standard, you’ll always fall short! The hope is that everyday we can be a little better then our own personal best.

Do your thing and do it well.

This year can be great for ALL OF US! There is more then enough success to go around 🙂

Xo.. Lori

JOIN THE JOURNEY

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On April 24th 2011 at 3:00am my life changed forever. In the darkness of the basement, in the still of the night, I heard a voice, a call, a purpose. In that moment, from a deep sleep I was suddenly awakened.

‘It was never my will for you to live defeated.

It is my will for you to experience this for a season, conquer and share.

I am more than sufficient.’

Just like that, I knew my purpose in life wasn’t to just ‘get by’, it wasn’t just to survive; I knew that morning that my life would consist of more than the mundane and that through my journey and through my process, I would encourage and inspire others to see that we are all made for more, we’re all created to flourish.

I remember later that morning I went to church and I told my best friend what happened to me. I was terrified. I didn’t feel excited, I didn’t feel qualified, I felt terrified. If I remember correctly, outside of my husband, that was the first and last conversation about this night that I would have for years.

People would ask ‘What do you think God has called you to do?’.. Rather than respond with the truth, I would sheepishly shrug my shoulders and say ‘I don’t know’… But I did know. I knew exactly what God called me to do; He called me to WRITE!

I knew in the depths of my soul that I was called to a specific journey, at a specific time, for a specific reason and my mission would be to take those around me on that journey through my writing in a way that inspires and encourages change, growth and development.

This blog is an invitation to join me. Join me a journey through motherhood, marriage, ministry, continuing education & career exploration. Join me through life’s ups and downs, through the good and bad, we can explore faith, hope and love, relationships, disappointments, fears and failures together.

My life isn’t perfect and it’s definitely not easy, but my hope is that it will be inspiring to all those who think they are alone. Together we are better.

If you’re interested in joining me on this journey, please click the link below to follow my blog. I’ll be posting both traditional blogs as well as video blogs about everything and anything. Like what you hear? Drop a note, leave a comment, share a post! Whatever works for you, but I would love to know that you’re there, that you’re listening.

Xo… Lori