A few weeks ago I made a hair appointment. I haven’t colored my hair since May & I haven’t cut it since June!! Needless to say, it was time.
I scheduled my appointment, I started searching Pinterest for inspiration and I was totally ready and excited for a fresh look. I wasn’t unhappy with my hair, but it was time, you know?..
So the week or so leading up to my appointment the strangest things started happening. I had the BEST hair days, my color looked amazing, I was loving my length and I started to wonder ‘Do I really want to do this?’
I mean of course I did! And it was definitely time but for whatever reason, I felt like ‘maybe it’s not time’ or ‘maybe it’s not what I really want’.
I almost considered cancelling my appointment until I was able to identifying the common denominator. Anytime I’m on the the brink of change (no matter how big or small) my mind goes wild. I over think, I over analyze and I almost always try to talk myself out of whatever I was doing. This could be for anything on a scale from hair colors to career changes. The pattern was enough to make me ask myself; Why is this always the case when I face an opportunity for change?..
My example might seem shallow but think about it; how often do you approach the threshold of change only to look back and think;
‘Is this really necessary?’
‘Do I really want to do this?’
‘Maybe it wasn’t so bad to begin with.’
‘I know I haven’t grown in this position, but they are really flexible with my schedule!’
‘This relationship isn’t going anywhere, but do I really want to start over?’
‘I wanted to start working out this week, but do I really need to? I kind of like how I look a little thicker.’
‘I’ve always wanted a big family, but maybe it’s just not realistic for me.’
‘I would love to go back to school, but am I really the book smart type?..’
There’s something about being on the brink of change that makes you look back and focus on the past rather then looking forward to the possibilities.
It’s not until you give your two week notice that you remember all the good memories you’ve made at your job.
It’s not until you’re ready to walk out of that relationship that you remember that one special night.
It’s not until you’re ready to buy a home that you appreciate the convenience of renting.
It’s not until you’re ready to move across the country that you realize you have more friends then you thought.
There’s something about the fear of the unknown that makes you look back frantically for something familiar to hold on to.
I’ve done this so many times in my life. Sometimes the fear merely intimidated me, but other times it immobilized me and kept me stuck in a places I had no business being. I’ve found that when I am most afraid of letting go, my fear isn’t based on what I’m leaving, but that where I’m going won’t be better.
It’s scary to look into the unknown with uncertainty but we have to become uncomfortable with looking back to the once was when we have the opportunity to look forward to the what could be.
I can’t be the only one who faces change with fear. I can’t be the only one who looks forward with excitement but inevitable shrinks back from intimidation. But I also know that I can’t be the only one desperate to break free of the chains of my past and more forward into the possibilities of my future.
It’s one thing to talk about it, it’s another thing to plan for it, it’s quite a different thing to actually do it! I’ve come to the point where if it scares me, I’m going to face it. If it intimidates me, I’m going to do it. It might start off small, but I refuse to live in the false security that mediocrity provides. If I can commit to doing even one thing everyday that makes me even a little nervous, I know I can find growth.
What can you face today? Maybe it’s as simple as cleaning our your closet, but maybe it’s as difficult as ending a long time relationship. Maybe it’s cleaning out your cell phone contacts or maybe it’s finally commuting to that job, that relationship or that move you’ve been procrastinating. Whatever it looks like for you, commit to being brave today.
Push past the petty & step into purpose. Change doesn’t just happen, sometimes you need to chase it down.
Make the appointment.
Plan the dinner.
Set up ‘the talk’.
Seek the help.
Cancel the subscription.
Skip the gossip.
Make yourself accountable.
Do what you need to do to get where you’re trying to go. One small change can be the catalyst to living the life you’ve always dreamt of.
What change will you chase down today?