It’s been just over 5 weeks since my newest princess, Ella Paisley, was born and let me tell you, it’s been a crazy 5 weeks! Starting from the morning of her birth day, everything has been a while and crazy ride like I’ve never experienced! The transition to becoming a family of five has been nothing short of eventful.
Since her birth, I’ve been home with Ella and her two big sisters, Savannah (5) and Rylee (2).
Recovering from surgery, caring for two toddlers and adjusting to the demanding needs of an infant has been interesting. Some days I felt like Wonder Woman & other days I wonder how I’ve made it this far! Between wiping butts, nursing, cleaning, cooking & everything else- I feel like a crazy woman! I mean, does the laundry every end?!
In the madness there’s one thought that stays on my heart day and night, the days are long and the years are short. I must say this to myself 100x a day, literally. Sometimes it encourages me, other times it saddens me, but every time it reminds me to slow down and enjoy the ride, because before you know it, it’s over.
I still remember the day my oldest daughter was born, I mean, I can still remember the day I found out I was pregnant!! Yet here we are, five years, two siblings & one tired Momma later… Gosh, time sure is flying.
Reminding myself of this very thing everyday has helped me adjust in ways I’m not sure I can explain but I want to try. If you’re a Momma, you know that motherhood can also be known as ‘lonely-hood’ at times and my hope is to in some way, even the smallest way, minimize that. Whether your kids are 2, 22 or 42, I’m sure you can relate.
This is a tough one, but patience is everything! I would like to think at this point in the game I’ve mastered this but yet somehow this seems like the skill I need to learn every- single- day !!! Be patient with recovery, be patient with the baby, be patient with the toddlers, be patient with your spouse, be patient with the entire process and adjustment period. NONE of it comes easy. This is my third repeat c- section so although I’ve been here before, this one seemed much different then the others and I had to be patient! It took me much longer to recover which was frustrating, I didn’t feel like my spouse or kids could really understand how difficult this was for me (understandably) and life was moving way to fast while I remained slowed down and frustrated. Patience was essential to my peace!
I like to plan! But in the words of OutKast, ‘you can plan a pretty picnic, but you can’t predict the weather’! Gosh, this is tough. How do you balance planning and preparation with the fact that you can’t control everything and things don’t always go how we expect them to? Well for me, I’ve realized that the more I plan & prepare, the less impact I feel when things do derail. I can’t change the fact that life happens and things get messy, but staying organized has helped me to handle those obstacles better. For example, my daughter was born 3 1/2 weeks early. The morning of her birth I did not have the slightest idea that she would arrive later that day. I’ve never had a pre-term baby so in my mind, I had time! But yet at the time of her birth, my hospital bag had already been packed, her car seat was ready, bassinet assembled, clothes washed (etc, etc, etc) leaving me little worry or concern as I got wheeled into the OR nearly 4 weeks earlier then I expected.
On a day to day basis, this means packing diaper bags and picking out clothes the night before, setting my alarm a little early to get myself ready while the kids are asleep, meal planning & using my calendar to remember important dates or to do’s as well as ensure I don’t over commit or extend myself. As much as I can help it, I just don’t wait until the last minute to do anything. I can’t avoid life interruptions, I can’t control every situation but I can plan, prepare and organize my life in such a way that when those hiccups come, I’m as prepared as I possibly can be and this minimizes the impact!
Nothing looks the same, NOTHING! I’ve resolved in my mind that my hands will ALWAYS be outnumbered from this day forward and the best thing I can do is roll with it. I can’t be the same person I was before Ella’s birth. I can’t give of myself or time the way I did before her birth, everything has changed and rather then striving to keep things the way they were, I embrace our new normal. I think one of the ways we set ourselves up for failure is by putting far too much energy into trying to keep things the same rather then adjusting to the differences. Embrace the change, embrace the differences, embrace the crazy! It’s here! And any time you spend trying to fight that will be wasted, but the time you spend evolving into the new normal is invested into your future!
I wish I could slow down time, I wish they could be little for just a little longer, I wish I could bounce back faster each time but the truth is it can’t, they can’t and I can’t. This is life! Messy, full and beautiful. I want to encourage you to love those long days with all you’ve got because one day those long days will become short years and faster then we know it, it’ll all be over. Fix your eyes on your path and ride it till the end!!
I hope you’re encouraged, I hope you know you’re not alone and I hope you know there are miracles in the mundane. Look for them, you’ll see it.
In an upcoming post I may share some of my best baby purchases and the things I just can’t live without during this season of life. Comment below if that’s something you’d be interested in seeing!